This week was really difficult. This will probably be a short post too because I’m so tired. I have completed Week Three of Couch to 5k. The runs included three minute bouts of running, which sounds fine, but not for me.
I haven’t slept very well at all this entire week for a multitude of reasons. I’ve also been feeling really low. Never a good sign. And as a result I’ve been super tired the whole week. My sleeping patterns are all out of whack and I’ve been sleeping in, almost losing the whole morning, which is the most productive part of any day.
The weather has also taken a turn i.e. it’s back to normal here in Ireland. It’s been drizzling for my first two runs but today it was absolutely lashing out. Somehow having buckets of water dripping off of you isn’t quite motivating.
Even with the tiredness, the blues and the rain I didn’t give up though. I never stopped and I never walked when I should be running. I gave it all I had each time. The narrator even says in the Week Three podcast that the feeling of accomplishing a difficult run far outweighs the pain you feel during the run. And I think she’s right. For those of you who follow me, I’ve been unable to run in the past for more than four minutes or thereabouts. This week I ran nine minutes three times and I’ve also been doing my Blogilates workouts in between running days.
My fitness and strength has become very important to me. I am doing Pop Pilates, running, weights, using the side stepper, wearing ankle weights and eating as clean a vegetarian diet as I can. Every day. I won’t say it’s always been easy because it hasn’t. If I get low at all I still workout but I eat badly and I leave working out until before bed. This week I learned something though. Beating myself up about falling off the wagon doesn’t help. In fact it makes me feel much worse. When I make myself feel worse about it, the low period only lasts longer and the cycle keeps going. The only way to fix it is say to myself ‘that was yesterday, let’s start over now again’ and get back on the clean-eating train. I really want to stick to this as best I can because I know how much better I feel when I eat well and work out. I just feel … lighter? I don’t even know if that makes sense, but anyone out there suffering from depression might understand what I mean.
I guess this is a long-winded way of saying that I’m trying to notice more, the silver lining in everything. ❤